No No Longer Means No

Photo by Gemma Evans on Unsplash

I grew up hearing that no means no.

No one likes to hear no as an answer.

No means that what I was dreaming about is now, not possible.

It means that all that time I had spent processing what could be was now shut down at someone else’s discernment and discretion.




You’ve been that way too after someone’s NO haven’t you?

Can I give you something to chew on? What if NO doesn’t actually mean it’s not possible? What if no only means, I’m not interested.

Not only is our family entrenched in ministry and helping people experience God through incredible ways, but one of the ways that fleshes out tangibly is through real estate. Crystal and I have dabbled in this for years now, buying, renovating broken down properties and then either keeping them or selling them. It’s been a lot of fun, but there’s also been a lot of NO YOU CAN’T DO THAT.

Man if I had a dollar for everytime I’ve heard someone tell me NO when it came to something we were planning!?

When we first started in this, everytime I heard that answer, something in me would die just a little bit. I was hearing that my plan was coming to an end and I would act that way. I was going about it like I was giving this person total authority to decide my future and they were bringing it to and end right in front of my eyes.

Thankfully my dear sweet wife is far smarter than I and had learned this lesson years ago. She was always indifferent to their answer.

For me, it took a few more times around the block before I learned that with most people their NO was just I’m not interested in working with you on this. In no way did it have any indicator on the fact that it could or could not be accomplished.

Now here we are some years later and still playing the same game and still hearing the same answer. No. No. No.

I spoke with a bank in July about our next deal, and the guy on the other end from somewhere in Kansas, let me down easy, not by saying no, but by saying, your situation makes us uncomfortable, so we are not going to move forward with your idea.
My demeanor? There’s another bank that wants to work with us.

I spoke with a forestry consultant about cutting trees off our property and again, no the trees you have aren’t worth anything.

About what was the last thing someone told you no?

How did it make you feel? Defeated? Frustrated? Fearful?
It always made me feel like someone was popping the balloon of my dream and I’m not good with that anymore.

Here’s my encouragement for you… Stop taking no as your final answer!
Only take no for your answer when you’ve exhausted every option, until then no only means, I’m not interested, keep looking.

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